4/1

having a hard time doing anything today — feeling overwhelmed by house things again

a music evening
listening to devil doll —thinking about mitzi and the other dogs — the incredible sadness and happiness — despite all my depressions there are some totally beautiful things in the world — dogs — i worry so much about them — i can’t stand any suffering — so many deaths — melancholy and the infinite sadness

i don’t understand music — how someone can do something this beautiful — the instrumentation — listen to music and be happier — i started liking jazz — there is so much — i’ve been coming back to al stewart a lot — i want to get back to some of the hard stuff but can’t get into it — so many things i like — why am i ever depressed

4/3

on different types of collections
collected llanite yesterday (write about this — wild flowers)

looking at the stones trying to decide what to send to S — they look different each time — each one is unique and there are so many good pieces

stamps — there is the consideration of condition but postage stamps of the same issue are not unique — i like collections that are impossible to differentiate — to pick out the best pieces — how can one choose the best circuit boards (photographs)