6/21 p4

it’s getting bright — i hate sunblock

AFTERNOON
another walk — water all the way up to the dunes - high tide & storm tide — still very little on the beach but i found a few good things — sea bean — a nice piece of metal —
plastic — a couple of pieces — i almost never pick up plastic — the mess along the dunes — all kinds of garbage — something will evolve to eat it probably — will humans still be around — i doubt it — the constant wind — the palm tree in the wind —
sex feeling — sexual energy has increased recently but i still don’t ‘get it up’ good without cialis —
fuck on the rug?

thoughts lost — walking the beach — surprised that more things weren’t washing up — thunder strorms in the forecast so that may have been our last walk —

TIME — how do i divide up the time — will it take all that i have left just for the notebooks — are they worth it —
40 years into 7 — 49 years into 7
7 years / year — 7 years = 84 months / year —
7 months / month — no ?
my math / arithmetic ability has become shit —
make several scans ?

what about all the other things — the notebooks will remain (be left) — but for what — for whom —

from womb to furnace — ashes — where — on a cabinet with the dogs & cats until kim dies — into the air into the water — the thought is depressing — disgusting —

tired — headache from the wind —
should i go out on the patio —
should hear from the pet sitter soon —
—
too much art [to do] —

7 years = 364 weeks
about 1 1/2 month / week