4/26

turned off the computer because of the storms — grey wind
sheets of rain flashes light and sound
I need to get some resume stuff finalized — call a few job places — what do I want to do — a strange year — from birthday to birthday — making such huge decisions — about 1 year ago Kim came for her first interview

a strange diminishing of the sound of the storm — a lull in the movement of the trees

my goal is to write a book that will be regarded as summarizing the era — the artist in the zeitgeist — periods of transition [Van Morrison] — I can’t even write my own resume

waves of rain — a gray sky — it seems I’ve lived here forever —
in this house
honeysuckle is in bloom — but outside still seems strange
other blossoms are fading

so the day is passing — it’s time to do something and I tense up — a couple of phone calls — they’re always easier than they seem — making some progress in resume — won’t send any out today but should be able to get them out tomorrow — I need more physical activity

the last day of this notebook — need to work out a new system for the new (what kind of year is it — life year) — I should go back to the loose leaf idea with several sets of notes going on at the same time so I can just do some art work and music work and have working papers with me — the chronological notes can be set aside after they’re done — I should have some ‘directed’ notes — print out etc — that I can work on — like now — but a single ‘book’ is so much easier to handle — maybe I should go back to the sketch book or notebook idea with an index or whatever

but loose leafs allow moving pages around — a loose leaf binder with some insert pages etc

white winged doves — not in the area by the maps — but they’re here
ground doves
mourning doves — blue jays — mockingbird — red winged blackbird

one day at a time
starting to build up mentally for a job hunt took a week — work on lab stuff first and build up a portfolio