7/5
trying to decide whether I should keep my music equipment or just narrow myself down — I sill can’t get at the problem of actual production — of anything — I haven’t done anything artistic in months — years
the question is do I really want to
the question is can I
the question is should I bother
high noon in the Texas heat
thinking about yard design - fountains etc — can I work all these things into some art work
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copied the 12/98 notes to the PageMaker file
deleted things after March from the first 1998 PM file — made some style changes but not sure what else has to be done
7/10
I need to focus on my notes and get into that endless cycle of whatever that I like
I could do yard diagrams etc art drawings — while sitting in the yard —
sitting in the yard — mind loses focus — the sound of the mockingbirds —
leaves in the breeze — being able to sit outside nearly every day —
my head is empty — floating thoughts — all the work that could be done and I have no ambition at all —
if I had a computer out here would I do some drawing
my reading has been sporadic — reading the Delillo when I get a lunch break —
not sure that I want to finish it — I’m growing really tired of ‘normal’ novels —
I find the movement from character to character very annoying —
a style device I really despise — a character is mentioned and then there is a chapter on that character
reading Irene’s Cunt — started Patterns but didn’t read much of it yet —
still reading The Atlas as bedtime reading and nearly finished —
a few pages a night
cloud patterns in the breeze