notebooks page

8/3

a bad day yesterday — the feeling of nothing being worth doing the feeling of worthlessness

feeling badly about S— he was (or seemed) happy - had many things he wanted to do - was liked by many people etc etc
i don’t know anyone — i’m generally not happy - don’t have things i really want to do etc
and he is the one who dies
my positives — i love my dogs — at times i feel i don’t do enough for them and they irritate me and i get angry - but i think i do good with and for them and that all our dogs and cats have had good lives — (kim gets angry at me as often as i get angry at the dogs — and i get angry at myself much more often than i get angry at anyone
today is better
doing things despite thinking there is no end result (i need to redo my cioran reading) —

i’ve been looking at photoshop lessons but haven’t done any photo work and haven’t done any note work

yesterday and this morning i was thinking of getting rid of things — planning on 10 years and reducing by 1/10 a year (but that would be a never ending progression or regression) - how would the reduction be calculated to get rid of everything in 10 years while continually gathering more things