8/27

every morning i go through the process of restarting — thinking i should give up then thinking i should go on then thinking i have to go on then thinking it doesn’t matter

where does text like this belong — ‘publish’ it now or wait for the designated time slot in the random sequence of notes — and this needs some sort of introduction to explain the time sequence which may already have been explained
maybe i should put new notes into some sort of side text for now and then into the random sequence later —

reading beckett malloy — a dense text — brilliant but nearly unreadable — i’ve written a sparse text — i can’t say it’s brilliant (whatever that means — a bright light — i’ve grown tired of bright light — i used to love being out in the sun now i avoid it) but it’s {possibly / probably} unreadable

TEXT — how many years will it take
what is the goal
45 years / 3 = 15 years / year —— 180 months / year = 3.5 / week

i still haven’t been able to portion my time — i also need to factor in future months — so it’s more like 4 a week — possible?